well its a mad dash business week
buying oh a thousand pounds of meat and fish
meeting clients
running to chinatown to buy a kazillion tiny little plates that look like leafs
you know
the usual
i was thinking about my month in provincetown this past summer
how wondrous it felt to wake up every day and paint
write for hours every night
walk the beach and ponder my thoughts
for one month i lived the life of a person
who truly eats, drinks, sleeps and lives in creativity
today
my manic business mode has set in
big time
and that month in ptown feels like its part of my distant past
but at least there are the paintings to look out
the 40 page long short story that feels like it wants to be a book
to read
at least there are remnants
im not saying
that im feeling sorry for myself
having to leave my artist side
and live in my business side
because my business side buys me the life
that lets me paint and write
and gives me the home to paint and write in
and gives me the security
to not feel afraid
and luckily
of course
my business life
entails making beautiful food
which sometimes feels as creative
and inspired
as a master painting
its just that
well
i dont feel like working today
then again
who does?
