ok
i gotta say this out loud
i thought i was strong enough
to get HBO
that id be able to have HBO
and still write
paint
see my pals
have a life
but you know what
ive been addicted
oh my god
every night at 8pm
that thing sucks me in
for like 4 days in a row
its scary
ive got to set
boundaries
ive got to break this down
just a little at a time
maybe start by keeping the boob (not those kinds of boobs) tube off every other night
tonight
yes
yes
tonight
i will not turn on the TV
before 10pm (queer as folk on Showtime gotta see that i mean all dykes love fag porno its a well known fact)
i dont know what it is
but in the last couple years
my brain has been so busy
that the only that soothes it
is TV
not reading (too quiet)
not music (too musical)
i need the big box
and HBO
is the nail in my mental coffin
aaaakkk
help me please
i am powerless over HBO
sigh
ok
the sun is out
the sky is clear
the children are playing
ive got mood music playing
some island beat
very up
but mellow
like me
ill take a long walk thru the city
ill bring my notebook
ill go to a poetry slam
ill
ill
ill
stop looking at me
that big screen
its trying to suck me in
get away from me
im shutting the door
im not listening
i dont care
if sex in the city might on
or the sopranos
leave me alone
you HELL BOX
ok
ok
im counting steps
i am willing to admit that im powerless over HBO
i am willing to give this up to a higher power
that being hmm SHOWTIME?
ill start counting
err
hours
yes
yes
i can do this
i can
i can
hehehhehee
aaaaaaaaaa
